The Hidden Cost Of Letting Retail Define Pleasure Brands

On paper, visibility is a win. Greater access breaks stigma. More shelf space, conversations and normalization all seem like positive signs of progress. But dig a little deeper, and it’s clear that the arrival of vibrators in the personal care aisle isn’t just a cultural shift. It’s also an economic one — and for many specialty store owners, it’s a shift that brings more harm than help.

The industry doesn’t have to choose between mainstream acceptance and independent integrity, as long as brands show up for the people who’ve always shown up for them.

Undercutting and Undermining

Retailers across the country agree that the core issue isn’t whether big-box stores carry adult products. It’s how they price them.

“It depends on whether the big-box is selling for the MSRP or not,” says Jimmy Roark-Gruender of Passions in Kansas City, Missouri. “If they are way under MSRP, I will quit carrying them. If it is a level playing field and they are selling for MSRP, there is no reason not to carry them.”

Standards such as the manufacturer’s suggested retail price (MSRP) and minimum advertised price (MAP) exist to level the playing field for all sellers. When enforced, they give small retailers a fair shot at competing. But in practice, enforcement is often inconsistent.

“Lots of big-box stores sell for a little over what I can buy it for,” Roark-Gruender continues. “They are effectively a distributor undercutting the rest of us.”

It’s a pattern many retailers recognize.

Impacting Public Perception

Such situations can create the false impression that the entire store is overpriced, rather than highlighting an isolated case of online undercutting. When customers see a product for significantly less elsewhere, it casts a shadow over the entire store, turning trusted relationships into awkward negotiations. It undermines the long-standing work of independent stores that have been educating, supporting and empowering customers since long before adult products became trendy.

Then there’s the question of value. When something is everywhere, does it still feel special?

Dolores Benford of The Ladies Room in North Wales, Pennsylvania, believes the answer is no.

“Not only the price, but the product you are selling is no longer ‘special’ if a customer can get it anywhere. Why should they come to me? It cheapens the item.”

Enforcing MAP consistently isn’t just a nice idea. It’s foundational to trust between brands and retailers. When a product’s price drops below what a small store can buy it for, it sends a clear and painful message.

Possible Ways Forward

“I always use the example of a liquor store,” says Roark-Gruender. “Yes, big-box stores sell liquor, but the people working there do not know the difference between good and cheap wine. So if you want the best selection and the people who have product knowledge, you go to an actual liquor store.

“Same with adult,” he says. “Every big-box sells it, but only a few brands, and no one has any product knowledge. If you want that, you come to your local adult store.”

How to preserve this dynamic, so that customers can continue to benefit from the added value that specialty stores bring?

Kendra Mixen of Condom Sensation offers one potential compromise.

“I would have no issues if they only allowed the big-box stores a limited amount of their products and left the higher end for our type of stores,” she suggests. “We can’t compete with their prices, even though we have six stores now.”

The most sustainable path forward may be that kind of segmentation: brands reserving premium lines or specialty-focused SKUs for independent stores. This policy allows big-box to serve a convenience-first customer while protecting the integrity and livelihood of stores that provide not just shelf space, but knowledge, nuance and community.

What’s Really at Stake

As adult products continue to become more visible, brands will have to make strategic choices about where their items are sold, understanding that their decisions affect the people who have helped build and sustain their reputations.

What’s at stake isn’t just sales. It’s the long-term health of a diverse, thriving adult retail ecosystem. Specialty stores offer more than convenience. They offer guidance, safety and empowerment. They give people a place to ask the questions they can’t ask in the personal care aisle.

In this new era, visibility should not come at the cost of value. The industry doesn’t have to choose between mainstream acceptance and independent integrity, as long as brands show up for the people who’ve always shown up for them.

Rin Musick is a 10-year adult retail veteran who has worked in every store position from sales associate to general manager. As a brand ambassador for Sportsheets, she brings her passion for end-user satisfaction to her mission of spreading the word about the company’s historic, current and future innovations in connecting romantic partners.